So, after the advice of a nurse and several other "moms", Jeremy and I ordered "Happiest Baby on the Block". This is a DVD that gives parents tips on calming crying babies and helping new babies sleep longer through the night. I must say as we were watching we kept looking at each other saying "no way!- lets wake Joshua up and try this now!". We were very impressed.
Of course, we did not wake Joshua up. However, when he did wake up fussy, we used the techniques from the video and were amazed to know they worked!
I must recommend this video for ALL new moms- so if you are one, or know one, please get this video! It helped us tremendously with getting Joshua to sleep longer at night- even just putting him down in the beginning. I cannot stress enough how it helped us and Joshua . . . so please get it and watch it soon!
There is also "Happiest Toddler on the Block" that we plan to purchase when Joshua gets older!
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3 comments:
I bet you are an INCREDIBLE momma!! You'll keep your eyes first on Christ, and all the parenting just falls into place. :)
I've heard of the 5 S's, but never seen the video or read the book. I just reserved my copy at the library :)
I have a great book that would highly recommend - "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp. Excellent Biblical perspective on why and how we discipline as parents.
Hey Tracy,
I'm still waiting for my turn with "The happiest baby..." from our library, but I borrowed and watched "The happiest toddler..." in the mean time. I was wondering if you've seen it yet and what you think.
I've been thinking about it for a few days since I watched it, and I think I disagree with the method for one reason in particular. Other than my own discomfort with speaking "toddler-ease", I've been thinking that the method teaches the child that expressing anger through a tantrum is acceptable behavior by the adult matching the phrasiology and intensity of the child's emotions. I don't know if what we're doing with Abigail is right, but we've been pleased with the results lately. We try to talk to her in a calm voice and ask her to express how she's feeling without screaming and flailing.
Like today, actually, we were on our way home around lunchtime and we passed Chic-fil-a. Abigail is after my own heart, and LOVES that place. She asked if we could eat there, and we told her "not today". She started throwing a fit in her carseat. After a few minutes of crying, I turned around to her and said calmly "why are you crying?" She yelled back at me, and I asked her to tell me with a nice voice. She knew what I meant, and was able to say to me calmly that she wanted Chic-fil-a, and amidst sniffles, listened to me when I explained we didn't have time today, but that mommy loves it too, and that we would try to stop there again soon. Then I gave her a couple of choices for lunch at home - ham and cheese, pb&j, or leftover spaghetti. That ended it, and we had a nice lunch at home. (She had pb&j)
A few weeks ago, Abigail started saying to us "I'm getting angry with you" when we would tell her no about something. At first, I thought it was bad for her to say that to me, but then I realized (after talking it over with Jon) that it's actually exactly what we've been working towards. She's learning to tell us how she feels without crying. It gives us the opportunity to answer her about why her anger is wrong or selfish, or how to not sin in her anger if she's justified. We can help her now to learn to use biblical terminology, too, so she can better understand how God views her behavior. I usually say something to her like "I understand that you're angry, and that's okay, but God says that you should obey mommy even when it's not what you want."
I can see why the "happiest toddler" method works, and I think in a way what we've been doing follows some of the same principles - communicating to the child that you understand their feelings. But I think the method misses the most important part - teaching the child how to express their anger/emotions in a more acceptable form than a tantrum. For us, the larger goal is to teach our children to be self-controlled.
Wow... I rambled. Sorry :) Obviously, we're not perfect parents, and we've definitely had to endure many-a-tantrum that couldn't be resolved with calm reason. I think overall, though, that maintaining our calm as the adults is helping to teach Abigail how to keep hers, too. I hope that she knows that I care about how she's feeling!
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